Odds and ends
9:08 p.m. on 2003-03-04
I don't even know how I am going to start this entry. Today, I worked. Big shock I know. My god, I taught sixth graders. They were so full of energy that I was so tired when I got home. I am taking tomorrow off, and having an Alvie get caught up day. I have so much homework, I pray that I stick to the plan.
So let's see, what is new? Well, yesterday, Jesse and his boyfriend broke up. I kind of feel a tad bit guilty, because he snuck out and went to lunch with me right before hand. I kept telling Jesse if his boyfriend calls while we are having lunch, just let the phone ring. Why was I feeling that way? He and I are only friends, and if you have to sneak around to visit with friends, then something is wrong. You remember how Jesse was banned from my house, because his boyfriend said I would want to blow him? Well, he did come to my house, just to see it, we had lunch then I took him home. I wish I wouldn't have made a few comments about his boyfriend to him, because now in a small real small way I wonder if I said something to cause it? I always do this to myself.
Well, let's see some odds and ends stuff. I have only had two calls from Mr. Stalker in the last day, so I think he might be getting the hint. When Angie showed up at my door on Friday, she had her own pillow. I was asked twice by two women this weekend to see my "toy", and then to top it all off I was asked how big my dick was. I won't lie, I don't have a huge one, but on the same hand, (funny how my hand and dick both end up in the same sentence, just like real life,) its not too small, I like to think of it as a happy medium. I guess right now its more medium than happy. It needs some exercise. I am normal, but in todays world, I guess thats not good enough anymore. Not only do we want our fries and coke supersized but we want our dicks that way too. Hey I am just as guilty, only I don't want to do anything with that Mr. 10incher other than look at it. Well, maybe slap it around and call it big papa. Lord I am a slut. My "toy" is that one I have in the closet remember? I thought guess at least it got to see the light of day twice. I was thinking about it again, but had second thoughts.
This is my 20th time I have wrote in here, and I still can't believe that anyone would read this. Oh and the nice notes that I get, always make me feel so good. I never would have thought a month ago, that I would do this. Isn't it funny how some little things can get us all hot and bothered? Like yesterday, I was reading some diarys. I always try to read everyone's diary that leaves me a note or something, or has me linked and all. And this one, you know who you are, says he woke up with a raging hard on. My god, that one little sentence, is causing me to have to do laundry tonight. I was so turned on by it. Then again when one humps pillows and blowup dolls, I guess I am easy to please. No but really, I sat here for the longest time just thinking about that guys words.
When I read on here that people are bored and stuff, (which I am guilty of) I always wish I was right there with you. Not that I would be some big sorce of entertainment, but I sure would love to be bored with someone. Its no fun be lonely or bored alone, better done with a partner I think. If I had to come up with a title for my life right now, I think I would call it ,SOMEWHERE BETWEEN LOST AND FOUND. Its just the way I feel. You know when things are going good, I am always looking over my shoulder for a steam roller. I don't know why I get like that. I am pretty happy tonight though. I think for the most part I am a plesant happy person. I do get a bit harsh on myself, and at the same time, I allow myself so much slack. Seems like I go from one direction to the next. I think that is what life is all about for me. I wonder if I would be happy having someone forever in my life? I will tell you this, If I ever do get lucky to meet my partner, by god he better not snore like Marry did. That bitch didn't let me get any sleep. I don't know what was worse. Sharing my bed with a woman or a person who snores. I tell you though I do love women, I have said it before, I love the girls but not the pussy. I was just thinking the other day, if I was a girl, I think I would be a whore.
You know what I think I have missed in life? Wet dreams. I have never had one. I have came so close, but yet just can't seal the deal. One time I was so friggin close and then I woke myslef up. I was really bouncing myself all around the bed going to town, and I guess the motion woke me up. Everyone I know has had them. Lucky fucks. I start having one of my sex dreams and it seems so damn real. I mean the taste, sounds everything, then the tension builds and right before I sign the check so to speak, I wake up. I swear I can't tell you how many times I have tried my hardest to get back into those dreams. I close my eyes and think about them hoping that I will pick up where I left off, but hell no. Then I get so flustered its just no fair. I swear, there seems to be nothing sacred to me? I don't think there is any topic I won't talk about. Well, one thing, if ever anyone who has read this diary ever meets me, you will not have to worry about any bones falling out of my closet. I should keep some things to myself, but I figure hell, we are all just people. So anyway, I had my finger in my ass and ... Just a joke, my god I am so joking, but you know if I do I will tell about it.
Well on a final thought for the night, I read this and it made me smile; Good advice is never as helpful as an interest-free loan. Love ya......Alvie
the latest:
Higher than the birds - 2003-10-21
friend trouble - 2003-10-14
Its just another cut day - 2003-10-10
hello, are you home - 2003-10-07
cumming soon - 2003-08-07